We all play small at times, often without even realizing we’re doing it. We keep ourselves in our safe little corners and dream that ‘maybe someday’, the life we want will somehow just magically happen for us, without us having to make any big changes, or step out of our comfort zones.
While we don’t always see it in ourselves, we do see it in other people. Think of the woman you know who has always talked about travelling the world, and yet has never bought a plane ticket. Think of the woman who dreams of meeting the love of her life and talks proudly about how she refuses to settle, but yet never goes on a date. Or the woman who dreams of doing meaningful work in the world but is too afraid to put herself out there and own what she does.
These women are all trying to avoid something. Whether that’s failure, rejection or something else. They all want their big dreams, but they want it to happen without them having to take any risks. They want to call in these exciting changes into their lives, without growing into the women they would need to be, in order to be able to receive them.
The life you have now, came through as a result of the woman you were when you created it. In order to call in something new and better, you need to release the old you, the woman who allowed her fears to stop her, and who lived her life in a way that allowed her to play safe and avoid pain. You need to grow yourself into the woman who opens herself up to her dreams, in spite of her fears, who owns her worth and isn’t afraid to be seen.
If you have spent your life as an employee, and you now dream of being a six figure entrepreneur, you need to allow the ’employee’ you to die, and step into being the woman who is a six figure entrepreneur, even before your six figure earnings show up in the real world. Employees can avoid being visible, and can play small. Entrepreneurs can’t and won’t.
If you have spent your life either alone, and/or with the wrong men, and you dream of being happily married to the love of your life, then you need to release the old you, who tolerated poor treatment, and settled for crumbs, and instead grow yourself into the woman who is blissfully cherished and adored and is head over heels in love with her amazing husband.
Spend some time this week, thinking of the life you want to live, and notice how often your actions line up with that. If you say you want one thing, but your actions tell you something different, ask yourself what you’re trying to avoid? What pain is it you’re trying to get away from? Are you hoping that the things you want will somehow happen without you having to put yourself out there and take risks to receive them?
If so, promise yourself that from now on, the actions you take will be in alignment with what you really want. Having to face your fear of opening yourself up to new clients won’t seem so bad when you’re choosing an exotic location to spend your Summer in, money no object. The idea of having been rejected by one random guy won’t seem so painful when you wake up every morning in the arms of the love of your life. Any pain is temporary,. Once it’s over with, it’s in the past forever. And it will be nothing compared to the pain you’ll feel if you look back over your life and know that you wasted your chance to live your dreams, by playing safe and small.